My Wife, Miriel
by DonCorneo
Summary: Robin and Miriel celebrate their wedding night. Contains Mature content.


"Robin," she said, as matter-of-factly as always.

I looked to my new bride and smiled. Miriel and I had been wed earlier that morning. It was a beautiful ceremony; all of the Shepherds were in attendance (even if Tharja seemed to be in a foul mood all day) and many of them cried when Libra pronounced us husband and wife. We shared a passionate kiss at the altar and celebrated our first day as a married couple by (what else?) clawing through hideous hordes of rotting Risen. By the time we finally found some downtime, it was nearly midnight and much of the camp had already gone to sleep. We retired to the barracks for some alone time, Miriel resting her head on my shoulder as she read a tome.

"What is it, love?"

She closed her book and turned her whole body so that her chin rested on my shoulder. "We have been wed for nearly 12 hours, now," she said. "If you are not otherwise preoccupied, I believe now would be an opportune time to evaluate our sexual compatibility."

My eyes went wide. Sure, I'd be lying if I said I hadn't been looking forward to it, but to hear my wife discuss it so bluntly caught me off-guard. I suppose it shouldn't have, since Miriel discussed everything with the same bluntness, but the only response I could conjure up was...

"Oh?"

"Yes," said Miriel. "A cohabitation between two people without the same sexual appetite or skill level is statistically doomed to fail. I do not intend for this marriage to be a failure, so I think it best that any incongruities between us be discovered as early as possible, that we might correct such issues immediately."

"I see," I said, letting out a nervous chuckle. "Well, I'm certainly up for it, but..."

"You are insecure about your own sexual prowess?"

Ouch. She could read me like a book. "Well, I... I guess I am," I stammered, not knowing a better response. "I mean, I've never..."

To be fair, I didn't know if that was true or not. It was certainly true that I had never experienced sex since I awoke in that field that one fateful day. But anything before then is a dense fog to me. Before that day, I might have been a virgin or a sexual dynamo. I would have no way of knowing. I was just hoping that the Tactician skills I had managed to retain were a sign that I had other applicable skills floating around in my memory somewhere.

"Fear not," said Miriel, snapping me out of my daydream. "I suspect you will make for a very capable lover. I have observed your penis and it is more than adequate. Yours is the third-largest in camp."

A small squeak escaped my throat, and I could feel my left eyelid twitching. "You...You've seen my...! Wait... You've seen _everyone_'s penis?!"

"Of course," she said, like it was no big deal. She sat up straight, and adjusted her glasses. "I've taken careful steps to observe everyone in camp, and I've compiled thorough charts of penis size, bust size, hip size, amount of pubic hair, fat distribution, and muscle mass, among other criteria. For purely academic purposes, of course."

I was stunned. I tried to shake the cobwebs out of my head, but I couldn't seem to wrap my head around what she was saying. Thinking about it now, there were probably a million better responses I could have offered, but all that came to my mind at the time was...

"So... you spied on me in the bath?"

Miriel pushed up her glasses and shrugged. "As I said, my interests were purely academic. In truth, on multiple occasions, I ascertained that Tharja was observing you, as well. Several times, I suggested that we collaborate and share data, but she never acquiesced to my invitations. She always seemed to flee when I appeared."

My head was spinning. What had I gotten myself into? "I knew about Tharja spying on me," I sighed, "But I assumed she was a special case..."

"Not at all. Interest in the physical form is only natural, particularly in objects of romantic interest. Surely you must have succumbed to curiosity and spied on me once or twice, in a moment of weakness."

I couldn't help but scoff. "No," I said. "I haven't."

She put her hands on her hips and puffed out her cheeks. "Hmph," she said, averting my gaze and turning slightly red. "Well, I'm offended. Are you not the least bit interested in bearing witness to my nude body?"

"Of course I'm interested," I said, rolling my eyes. "I'm _very interested_. But it's just common courtesy not to spy on people when they're at their most vulnerable!"

To my great surprise, Miriel let out a hearty laugh. "You are a perfect gentleman, Robin, and that is one of many qualities I admire about you. But I assure you, I would not have reacted harshly to your presence tangent to my nude form. Quite the contrary; many times have I pleasured myself in the bath, imagining you secretly looking on and doing the same."

"Whoa," I said, feeling the blood rush to my cheeks. "That's... a bit too much information."

I saw her eyes swell behind her thick glasses, and she did something I never would have expected; she slapped me right across the face. "Robin," she said, her voice cracking with overwrought emotion. "There is no such thing as too much information! It has been my life's dream to acquire all the knowledge this world has to offer... You should know this better than anyone. It is to that end that I have compiled so much data on our peers... and on you."

I put my hand on my cheek and stared at her with my best puppy-dog eyes. "Sorry," I said. "I just meant-"

"I am well aware of your intended connotation," she said. She turned away in what I can only assume was an attempt to hide the deep blush plastered across her face, but it was too late; I had already seen it. She cleared her throat and continued. "I know that most prefer not to discuss such private matters so openly, and I apologize for not considering your potential aversion to such a subject before I spoke. And... I'm terribly sorry for resorting to physical violence, as well. In a moment's frustration, I forgot myself."

"It's all right," I said, rubbing my cheek - it still stung! "I'm sorry, too. I'll be more careful with my choice of words, next time."

She turned back to face me and wiped a tear from her cheek. "That would be most appreciated," she said.

I couldn't help myself. I had to know.

"So... you really charted everybody's... sizes?"

She smiled and gave me a subtle curtsy. "Yes, indeed. They are rough approximations, of course, excepting the rare instances when I was discovered and allowed to procure more precise measurements."

I could feel a blush coming on again. Gods, my wife was as blunt as a hammer about this stuff. I could hardly believe what I was hearing. "Who actually let you measure them?!"

"Vaike was most accommodating. Though, frankly, his pride was unwarranted, as even at a cursory glance, his endowment is below the camp's average length."

I had to stifle a laugh. He always did kinda seem like he was compensating for something.

"I was also fortunate enough to acquire precise measurements for Sully and Donnel, though the latter was not very cooperative."

"So, uh," I said, not really wanting to think about my wife getting handsy with Donnel's manhood. Somehow, envisioning her fondling Sully's chest wasn't any less awkward. "You said I was the third-largest?"

Miriel winked at me, which I had never seen her do before. It quickly put a big, goofy smile on my face that I didn't care to hide.

"According to my estimates, at least," said Miriel. "Your equipment is indeed impressive."

"So... whose is bigger than mine?"

Miriel pushed up her glasses and fought back a smirk. "Henry's is the largest," she said.

I chuckled to myself. I never would have guessed that much.

"As for the owner of the second-largest penis in camp, I have promised to keep their identity a secret."

My eyes went wide. I never would have seen that coming, either. Who could it possibly be? Who in camp would want something like that kept a secret, let alone trust Miriel with it?

"Is it... Lon'Qu?"

Miriel shook her head. "Please refrain from guessing games," she said, her tone of voice saying the exact opposite. "I fully intend to keep my word and take this person's secret to my grave."

"C'mon," I said. I decided to play along. Curiosity had more than gotten the better of me by now. "You know you can trust me with anything. Whoever it is, I'm sure he would trust me, too."

"I'm sure she would," said Miriel. "However-"

"Wait, _what_?!"

My wife was positively beaming, now. I could tell just by looking at her that she _really_ wanted me to guess who it was.

But in that moment I could barely put a sentence together. It's true that I had lost a lot of my memories, but I was fairly certain girls didn't have those parts.

I swallowed in anticipation and opened my mouth to speak. All I could get out was, "..._She?_"

Miriel closed her eyes and grinned wide. "I've said too much."

"Does she have..."

She nodded. "Yes," she said, "This person possesses both reproductive organs, and to my knowledge, they are both fully functional. Her nude form is quite breathtaking, but she has insisted that I must pass her secret on to no one."

I turned my head to one side and tried to pull the truth out of her with my brain. Getting nothing, I thought a few more questions wouldn't hurt. "I take it you just happened to discover their secret while you were spying on them?"

"No," said Miriel, adjusting her glasses. "This person actually came to me asking to be studied, that I might discern the cause and implications of her androgyny. But, ah, again, I've revealed too much..."

In spite of my best efforts, I couldn't keep my jaw from falling slack. "Sully...?"

Miriel took a long glance at the ceiling, her cheeks turning an even deeper shade of pink. A tremendous, knowing smile was slathered across her face. "I can neither confirm nor deny this," she said.

I couldn't believe my ears. "Sully has a..."

A deep sigh escaped Miriel, and she pinched the bridge of her nose. "Please, do not take me to mean that our friend Sully is equipped with a phallus. I have made no such claim. But I will say that, if she did in fact possess such equipment, I would expect it to be quite long and slender and tapered, beautifully complimenting her dainty, feminine labia and her thick, curly pubic hair."

Now, _that_ was too much information, but I held my tongue this time. I couldn't seem to shake that mental image, no matter how hard I tried. I would never look at Sully the same way again, that was for sure.

I let out a deep sigh and asked the question burning a hole through my mind, knowing full well that the answer might only serve to further horrify me.

"You sound like you're... pretty well-acquainted with it."

"Robin," said Miriel, letting out a deep, trembling sigh of her own. "I must confess, Sully's unique anatomy did prove to be quite the distraction throughout my study of her, and just once, before you and I were betrothed, she and I did succumb to temptation and engaged in intercourse."

I could feel a knot being tied in my stomach. I guess it was unreasonable to expect that I would be Miriel's first, but I never would have expected that _Sully_ would have beaten me to the punch, let alone have the parts for it. And she was bigger than me?! In spite of myself, I had to ask...

"...How was she?"

"Exceptional," said Miriel, without a moment's hesitation. "Sully proved to be a confident, passionate lover, comfortable in her own skin. In the midst and immediate aftermath of our coitus, I admit I had considered further encounters, but my time with her only helped me to realize that you were the only sexual partner I desired. I imagine Sully feels much the same way about her new husband."

A sudden gasp escaped me. "That's right! Does Virion know...? About Sully?"

Miriel stifled a small chuckle and nodded. "I suppose he must."

A shudder went through me as I once again saw Sully's dick in my mind's eye. "And he's... okay with it?"

"I suppose he must be," said Miriel, wearing a smug grin. "He appeared not the least bit reluctant when I caught them engaged in intercourse on the night of their wedding."

"Eugh," I said, another chill running down my spine. Today's mental images would haunt me for years to come. Wanting to change the subject (and deciding that one more potentially scarring mental image couldn't hurt), I knew I had to ask the question that had been on my mind for a few minutes now.

"Was Sully... your first?"

"Yes," said Miriel, taking off her glasses. I didn't know if that made me feel better or worse. She pinched her robe between her fingers and rubbed it along the surface of her glasses, then returned them to their perch atop her nose. "But do not be alarmed," she said. "I insisted that she only penetrate my anal orifice, leaving my hymen intact for you."

It shouldn't have, but hearing that undid some of the knot in my stomach, if only just a little. "You didn't have to do that for me," I said.

"It was my own decision," she said, putting on a smile. "I have perused theories from multiple sources suggesting that the rending of a woman's hymen is infinitely more significant for both parties if it is given to a man... or, woman, as the case may be... whom she loves unconditionally. I wanted to test this hypothesis for myself. ...Of course, there is a flaw with this methodology: whomever I choose to give my first act of intercourse to, it will forever avail me of the ability to evaluate such an experience a second time, so I will never be able to compare both approaches. Still, I was not about to let a moment's indiscretion with a close female friend sour a conjecture that I have spent my entire adult life waiting to validate. Nor did I want to risk being impregnated by anyone other than the man I would like to grow old and bear children with."

My heart soared. There were a few words in there that I didn't quite understand, and I would have certainly preferred to hear it in another context, but hearing the love of my life say such kind words to me just made me melt. I stepped up to her and took her chin in my hand, planting a long kiss on her lips. She returned in earnest, taking my cheeks in her hands and pulling me closer to her. She ran her hands down my neck to my chest, feeling it expand with each breath that I took in. She balled my robes in her fists, kissing me even harder and deeper than before, until she finally broke with a loud "Mwah!"

"Now, strip," she said. I laughed at how direct she was being, but I wasn't about to object.

I undid my boots and placed them neatly in the corner, peeled my socks off and left them folded atop my boots. Miriel yanked my pants clean off my legs in one fluid motion, causing my cheeks to turn a bright crimson. "Such lovely, muscular legs," she said, running her fingers across my calves. This wasn't helping my blush situation at all. "Now, remove the loincloth."

I stood up and smiled. "Straight to business, hmm? You don't even want my robe off first?"

"Absolutely not," she said, blushing as well. "There will be time for that later."

I stuffed my hands under my belt and set about pretending to undo my loincloth. All I was really doing was imagining what was under Miriel's robes, preparing little Robin for his dramatic entrance. When he stood at sufficient attention, I untied my belt and let my loincloth fall to the floor. No longer weighed down by thick leather, my manhood sprung to life, bobbing a few times as it settled.

"Extraordinary," said Miriel, stepping towards me and adjusting her glasses. "Very impressive length and girth... beautiful color and shape..." She leaned forward a bit, getting a closer look at it, and it only further roared to life under her scrutinous gaze. "It's even more enchanting up close."

It felt like every other word out of her mouth was making me blush tonight.

"Hold a moment," she said, taking off her hat. She flipped it over and reached into its depths, producing a small, thin strap of leather, lined with evenly spaced black stitches and numbers.

I raised an eyebrow. "What are you-"

I cut myself off as she knelt down and wrapped the cloth tightly around my shaft, pulling the slack so that it was level with the ground. I rolled my eyes and breathed a small sigh. "Seriously?"

She peered at me over the rim of her glasses. "I never renounce an opportunity to extract such an intriguing piece of data," she said. "14.1 centimeters circumference." She shot me another wink, wringing yet another goofy smile out me. "Impressive. Well above average."

She lifted my member so that it was no longer resting against the top of my balls and pulled the leather strap tightly against the bottom of it, forcing her thumb into the furrow at the base of my shaft. As I studied her reaction, I was sure I spotted a twinkle in her eye, and I convinced myself that I even saw a bead of drool form on her lower lip. "Wonderful," she said. "19.8 centimeters. Marvelous... It's even more lovely and impressive than my projections..."

I couldn't help but blush. "What do you mean, "projections?"

She pushed up her glasses and pulled a quill and a small stack of parchment, no bigger than her hand, out of her hat. She walked over to the small desk against the wall, dipped the quill in the reservoir of ink perched atop it, and began to scribble something down. "Well," she said, walking back toward me, "Based on my observations, I had estimated it to be roughly 18.7 centimeters when erect, which is still significantly greater than the camp's average. To think you've exceeded my expectations by more than a full centimeter... You truly are saturated with pleasant surprises, Robin... Never ceasing to astonish."

I was blushing furiously from such a compliment, and in my heart, I wanted to offer my thanks. But without really thinking, I blurted out a petty, jealous response, instead. "But Sully's still bigger than me," I said.

"Hers is much longer, yes," said Miriel, flipping through her notes. "22.1 centimeters. But hers is also much narrower, only 12.0 centimeters in circumference, slightly below average."

My dick throbbed hearing those numbers, roaring to life and standing at even greater attention, as if desperately trying to stand on its tiptoes and appear even bigger. "Wow," I said, shaking my head. "22 centimeters and she's still smaller than Henry?"

"Yes," said Miriel, turning another page. "I haven't procured accurate measurements, but by my estimates, he would easily reach about 25 centimeters in length."

"Gods," I said. "That's a monster!"

Miriel let out a sharp laugh. "Indeed," she said, "I can only imagine what havoc it must wreak on Olivia's small frame." She stood up and tucked her notes and pen back into the pockets that she'd sewn into her hat, carefully balancing its floppy, pointed shape back atop her head.

I stepped toward her wearing a wicked smile, standing so close to her body that my manhood flattened against my stomach as it brushed against her robes. "Yeah," I said, my voice becoming a low growl. "She doesn't have those child-bearing hips of yours."

"Indeed," said Miriel, leaning forward so that her soft breasts squished against my chest. "My hips are the widest in camp, by my calculations. A distinction I take particular pride in."

I grinned and put my hands on her hips to get a feel for them myself. "Is that right?"

She pushed up her glasses and narrowed her eyes into slits. "Indubitably," she said. "Unless you mean to say you doubt my observations...?"

"I think I just might," I said, licking my lips. "Maybe if I got a closer look at them..."

She balled the right half of her long, flowing robe in her fist and hiked it up to her knee. She no longer wore pants since her promotion to a Sage, and the occasional glimpse of her pale, creamy calves that the wind granted me served as a frequent distraction in battle. She moved her right foot between mine, deliberately rubbing her thigh against my package, and let out a short, cocky chuckle. "But Robin," she said, "Their merits can't be fully appreciated by visual stimuli alone. Perhaps you'd have a better sense of their scope if you could feel my thighs clamp shut around your ears..."

I couldn't help but snicker. "Is that a threat?"

"It's an order," she said with a wink, "Mr. Tactician."

I pulled her hat off of her head and casually flung it to the side. "Well," I said. I brushed her bangs from her forehead and kissed her tenderly as I tried to think of what to say next. That turned out to be a foolish mistake, however, as the taste of her soft lips and the movement of her wet tongue only made me forget everything I ever knew. With no other response, I ended up offering her possibly the least romantic thing I've ever said...

"I... guess I better do that, then."

She licked her lips and a small chuckle escaped her nose. I could tell she wasn't impressed. I wouldn't have been either.

"Come now, Robin," she said, a playful tone hanging on her words. She crossed her arms and spread her feet apart, putting on her most defiant posture. "Surely the man I've acceded to spend the rest of my days with is capable of stringing together dialogue much more amorous than that."

I put on a giant grin and felt blush rush to my cheeks. "Heh... A thousand pardons, milady. I'm afraid, in the tender embrace of your lips, I seem to have bereaved myself of my most potent vernacular."

To my delight, Miriel's knees visibly buckled and a lusty grunt passed her lips. "Hmm," she said, laying her hands on my chest, beginning to pull my robe over my shoulders. "Fascinating." She gave me a quick peck on the lips, but pulled back before I could slip my tongue into her mouth again. "We must perform additional analysis," she said, pulling my robe off my head and giving me another kiss, this one a bit longer. "In order to ascertain..." Another smooch, this one punctuated by her fingers running through my hair. My robe was in a heap on the floor, now, leaving me in just a thin cloth shirt. "Just how dynamic an effect..." _Smak_. "Lip-to-lip contact..." _Smak, Smak_. "Has on your cognitive function."

"Mm," I said, my mouth full of my wife's soft lips. "Me Robin," I said, in between further kisses. "Pretty lady kiss good."

Miriel laughed into my mouth. "Hmhmm... Ever the deft poet, Robin..."

We kissed this way for a good five minutes. She pulled my shirt off, running her fingers through my hair and across my chest, rubbing her thigh against my erection, until finally she pushed herself away from me. "Now then," she said, taking both sides of her robe into her fists and giving a curtsy. "I believe I gave you an order, did I not?"

I stepped towards her and put my hands on her hips. "That's right," I said. "Let's see just how wide the widest hips in camp really are."

She pushed my hands away and stepped back again, putting on a big show of peeling back her robe. My dick and I gave her our full attention, watching silently as she hiked it up her muscular calves, past her cute, pink knees, over her milky thighs... until finally, her fleshy hips and plush pubic hair came into view.

For what seemed like the hundredth time today, I couldn't help but blush. "Miriel," I gasped, "You're not wearing any underwear!"

"No?" said Miriel, blushing even redder than I was. "Hmm. How curious. I must have misplaced my loincloth."

I bit my lip, completely failing to hold back the tremendous smile that broke its way across my face. Anyone in camp could tell you that Miriel had never misplaced anything in her entire life. Wherever that loincloth was, she had left it there deliberately.

I took another giant step toward her, pressing my erection against her stomach, and helped her pull the rest of her robe over her shoulders. Once we had, it was my turn for my knees to buckle; her pale, freckled skin was absolutely stunning, and I could see her deep blush extending down her neck and onto her pert breasts and shoulders. Her nipples were quite small and a gorgeous shade of pink, standing at full attention.

"I love you," I said.

"And I you," she said, hooking her left leg around my right. "You may begin your evaluation."

In one swift motion, I wrestled her to the ground and assaulted her silky thighs with kisses. She giggled all throughout, wriggling beneath me as I thoroughly investigated her womanly hips.

"Hmm," I said, feigning apathy. "They're pretty wide, I guess."

Miriel narrowed her eyes and grinned. She lay facing the ceiling, propping herself up with her elbows, looking down her body at me. "Surely, then, you would vindicate my assertion that mine are the broadest hips in this camp?"

"I don't know," I said, a playful lilt hanging on my voice. "I think Panne's might be wider..."

She scoffed and kicked me in the shoulder. "Imbecile!"

I know she wanted to sound threatening, but there was too much laughter peeking through the cracks in her voice. "Your powers of observation must prove much keener than that if you are to be my husband! Come! Feel my crushing superiority for yourself!" She wrapped her legs around my neck, pulling my face into her crotch, locking her ankles behind my head. My ears and cheeks could feel her thigh muscles pull taut beneath her translucent skin. I let out a sharp, muffled grunt, struggling to breathe under the powerful grip of her thighs; she only offered me a devilish laugh and clenched even more tightly around me.

I had only been teasing her, of course. There was never a real doubt in my mind: Miriel had the loveliest, womanliest hips of anyone I've ever known. Granted, my memories don't go back very far, but I'd known since the very moment I first saw her that she was a rare breed of woman. Even through her baggy trousers and flowing robes, I could tell. Her smothering embrace only further crystallized it for me. It was simply too much. Her pubic hair was the same deep shade of red as the hair on her head, and it was just as straight and just as soft. And her _scent_... I don't even know that I would call it pleasant, but it was the most bewitching scent I had ever taken in, and her pelvis and thighs were absolutely _saturated_ with it. Her vulva was puffy and swollen, hungry for attention. After just a few seconds of being held in this leglock, my nose, lips, and chin were thoroughly soaked with her natural lubrication. _Gods_, she was so wet; I knew enough about lady parts to understand how they worked, but I never imagined they would produce _that_ much moisture. Strange as it sounds, her wetness felt wonderful on my face. It was a difficult sensation to describe; this liquid didn't seem to "stick" to me in the way that water might, instead gliding effortlessly over my skin, making my chin slippery. I pulled her lips apart with my fingers (producing a wet _squishing_ noise) and a strand of transparent slime appeared between them; as I peered into the shadows of her pink maw, I could just barely make out her glistening, translucent hymen. I licked my lips and then set to work licking hers, drinking out of her folds like it was my last meal. If her flower was hungry, then I was _starving_. I drank her up; her delicious secretions, her intoxicating bouquet, her delighted gasps and her nervous twitches... I drank them all in. My erection was so rigid that I'm certain it could have cleaved diamonds in two. It demanded my attention, swinging between my legs as I kneeled there like that, so I spread my knees apart just a bit and forced my hand between my own thighs, taking my member in my fist and pumping it furiously.

I didn't really have a game plan. I was just lapping up every inch of her that I could lay my tongue on. But that changed when I found the sensitive nub that drew sharp moans and hot gasps out of her with each lick. Once I found that little button, I focused the bulk of my efforts on it. I nuzzled it with my nose and she winced with delight; I flicked it with my tongue and she released a low, husky moan. I kept expecting her to draw back her thighs and loosen her grip around my head, but it seemed she only coiled her legs tighter and tighter around my ears with each breathy sound I pulled out of her. I was actually starting to get light-headed, fearing that my head would pop like a grape between her thighs - not that I wouldn't have been perfectly happy to go out that way. I glanced up to meet her gaze, but I only caught the underside of her breasts; she was no longer propping herself up with her elbows, choosing instead to lay flat on her back. Just as I was about to attempt to say something, I saw her hands come towards me, brushing through my hair and coming to a rest on the top of my head.

"Oh! Robin," she said, pouring extra volume into her voice. "I knew that sharp tongue of yours would prove useful in multiple contexts... Make haste, love... my release draws near!"

Hearing those words, muffled though they were, threw my fist into a frenzy, stroking the length of my shaft faster than I think I could have voluntarily commanded it to. I brushed my nose against her tiny nub and craned my tongue deep into her slit, tasting as much of her as I could. I know she was the one being serviced, but between her soft fingers combing my hair, her pale, shivering thighs pressing against my ears, her aroma filling my nostrils and the taste of her arousal assaulting my tongue, I simply couldn't last any longer. I unleashed a muffled grunt into her vagina as I felt a thick wad of my seed burst forth from me and land on the stone floor of the barracks with a loud _splat_. With her head laid back and her mind clouded with other thoughts, I don't know if she even noticed that I had come already. If she did, she paid it no mind. I was a bit embarrassed to have relieved myself so quickly, and without any input from her, but it was really quite liberating, in a way; it freed me up to devour her cunny with even more ferocity, no longer needing to worry about holding myself back. I forced my tongue and bottom lip between her labia, letting my upper lip slide across her nub and the small hood that protected it, slathering them with saliva and affection. I planted a kiss on her sensitive button, letting my tongue peek through my pursed lips and swish across its hard, red surface.

"_Oh, Gods, yes,"_ said Miriel, finally uncrossing her legs and freeing me from her chokehold. She kept her thighs tight against my head, but lowered her heels to the floor and spread them apart, giving my neck some room to breathe. "Please... persist! My clitoris is on fire... Oh, Gods, Robin, I'm so close..."

I continued lapping at what I gathered was her clitoris, lavishing it with as much attention as I could. I gently pinched it between my lips and tongue, flicking my wet, writhing appendage along its underside. I brushed my nose across it and unleashed breath after breath of warm air upon it. She arched her back and pushed her hips back and forth along the cold floor, grinding against my face, moaning uncontrollably. Instinctively, I slid my hand back between my thighs, pleasantly discovering that my member was already totally erect once again. This time, though, I withdrew my hand and slowly laid my stomach to the ground, letting my dick splay out behind me. I decided to forego jerking off in favor of sliding my hands beneath Miriel's thighs and coiling my arms around them, pulling her even closer to me. My tongue darted in and out of her with mechanical precision now, sampling all of her landmarks in quick succession. A brief taste of her vulva, a quick brush against both sides of her labia, then a sample of the deepest parts my tongue could reach, swabbing from the bottom to the top. A few flicks across her hood and several dozen lashes of her clitoris, then back around for another lap. Her thighs were quivering and her breath had dissolved into loud, lusty panting. I never broke my pace, not even after she, at long last, pulled her thighs away from my head and spread her legs far apart. She pushed her fingers through my hair, toward the back of my head, and pushed me deeper into her crotch.

"Ohhh! Heavens," she cried, her voice cracking. "Such nectarous ecstasy cascading from my sopping interstice...! To endure such unconstrained jubilation... I am at my end, Robin! _I'm... coming_!"

I felt the walls of her vagina clamp down around my lips and tongue, twitching as I continued my ministrations. A new taste entered my mouth; similar to the taste of her arousal, but not quite the same. It was slightly more tangy... and I _absolutely could not get enough of it_. I was determined to drink my wife dry, and as luck would have it, she was more than willing to comply, writhing and bouncing and mewling and groaning and humping my face furiously as I drew out her orgasm.

When I had my fill (and when she had let her arms and legs fall to the ground in exhaustion), I straightened up, sitting on my calves, and watched her smooth, blushing breasts rise and fall as she struggled to catch her breath. "Inconceivable," she said. "Your skill is exemplary... You must've... done this before..."

"No, I swear I haven't," I said. "At least not as far back as my memory goes."

She laboriously pulled herself into a sitting position, taking my hand when I offered it.

"So, Robin," she said, brushing her hair over her left ear as her breath slowly returned to her. "Surely, after such close inspection... you must concede the eminent superiority of my hips, correct?"

I shook my head and laughed. She was still on that? I had forgotten that entire discussion. "Miriel," I said, scooping her up into my lap, letting my erection lay against her stomach. "You are absolutely correct. You are, without a doubt, the proud owner of the broadest, loveliest, most fertile hips in all the world."

A blush came across her face and she pushed up her glasses. "That is... unsubstantiated," she said. "I merely asserted myself as having the broadest in camp..."

"Now, now, dear, don't sell yourself short," I said. I gave her a playful slap on each hip, letting my fingers sink into her fleshy thighs. "These are clearly the widest hips the world has to offer."

She rolled her eyes and scratched her nose. "I'm not so sure I desire such a distinction..."

"Well," I said, biting my lip to hold back my laughter. "Perhaps you're right. But know this: if there _does_ exist even a single woman in this world with hips more perfect and lovely and captivating than yours..." I smiled and let out a soft giggle. "Then I pray I never meet her, because I would hate to have to leave you."

She shot me an odd half-smile, her brow furrowed in what looked suspiciously like jealousy. "Come on now," I said, fighting back laughter. "You must know I'm kidding. You know I'd never leave you, even if it _were_ possible for such a woman to exist."

She closed her eyes. "A fact I am well aware of," she said. "But now I know, should I ever come across one, that she must be swiftly and brutally disposed of."

I rolled my eyes. My wife had been spending too much time with Tharja... Trying to change the subject, I took one of her breasts in each hand, pushing and prodding their malleable surface with my fingertips. "Your breasts are beyond compare, as well."

"False," said Miriel, avoiding eye contact. "My bust falls squarely on the camp's mean...At only 91.5 centimeters in circumference, it is merely average..."

"No way are these 'merely average,'" I said, still fondling her chest. "Size isn't everything. You have beautiful, pink nipples... perfectly shaped areolae... adorable freckles, a flawless teardrop shape... skin as soft and as smooth as a cloud... And besides, yours are a great size. Much more than a handful. Honestly, I don't think I'd know what to do with them if they were much bigger."

She kept her head facing away from me, but met my gaze with a sidelong glance. "You wouldn't prefer Maribelle's? Or Tiki's, Anna's, Tharja's, or Noire's? ...Or, to extrapolate beyond our peers... Aversa's?"

It was true that Noire had the largest breasts in camp, and Aversa certainly had the largest breasts I'd ever seen, but just the thought of touching Tharja's kid or Validar's toadie sent shivers down my spine. "Absolutely not," I said. "You are absolutely perfect just the way you are. And I'm not just saying that. There's literally nothing about your body that I would change, even if I had the ability."

A deep scarlet came over her cheeks, nose, neck, shoulders, and breasts, peeking through her translucent skin. Gods, I loved this woman.

"I... thank you," she said, lowering her head and peering at me over the top of her glasses. "I confess, the same sentiment could be expressed for you..."

As if reading each other's minds, we both glanced down to my throbbing erection, brushing against her stomach as it stood at full attention. After an awkward silence, I looked into her eyes and borrowed a phrase from Frederick:

"Shall we, then?"

"Yes," she said. "My thighs are quivering with anticipation..."

I adjusted my posture, sliding my legs underneath her and pulling her higher up onto my lap. I took my member between my fingers and she propped herself up on my knees. We looked at each other and smiled. There was no turning back now.

Tentatively, I touched the cap of my member to her soft petals. I watched her lower herself onto me, watched with rapt attention as my twitching penis slowly disappeared past her fiery red pubic hair, past her sopping wet lips, pushing deeper and deeper into her embrace... She was awfully tight, but we went slow, and it slid in rather easily. I watched her face carefully for any sort of grimace until, at one point, she clenched her teeth and hissed. I didn't feel anything unusual, but I stopped immediately. "Are you all right?" I asked.

"Magnificent," she said, inhaling sharply. She grinned ear-to-ear. "Please... continue."

I was still a bit apprehensive, but I leaned forward a bit, and she arched her back a bit, pushing myself deeper and deeper inside of her until about two thirds of my entire length had found its way into her sheath.

...Something didn't feel quite right. I didn't know how else to ask, so I just spoke up.

"Uh... Miriel?"

"Y...Yes?"

"I didn't... feel any, uh... resistance."

"Ngh... If you are referring to my hymen... I can assure you, I felt it rupture... However... I have spent the last fortnight carefully stretching it, and... ah! Preparing for this very event, that it might be... Ggh! That it might be as painless as possible..."

She was breathing heavily and couldn't seem to decide if she wanted to clench her teeth or bite her lip. "You look to be in quite a bit of pain, anyway," I said. "Are you sure you're all right? Shall I stop?"

"Heavens... no," she said, wriggling her hips, grinding my manhood against her insides. "I'm in no pain at all... You misread my facial cues and vocalizations as expressions of anguish, but in actuality... Their provenience is one of intense pleasure...!"

She let out a fierce shriek and covered her face with her hands. "Gods... I never expected this... Your cock..."

My eyes swelled with shock and a gasp escaped me. I'd never been offended by such language, but I'd also never heard Miriel use such a vulgar word since I'd known her, and I never in a million years would have expected to hear such language pass her lips. Coming from her mouth, it made me feel like a small child hearing a foul word for the first time.

"Apologies," she said, apparently taking notice of my reaction. "Your penis..."

I was conflicted. In a way, it was invigorating to hear her speak so informally for once, but at the same time, it felt out of character; her detached, clinical way of speaking and looking at the world was, oddly enough, one of the things that drew me to her in the first place. I know it's strange, but... hearing her call it by its medical term felt so much more right to me.

"It's so warm," she continued. "It feels as though it is radiating heat... And it fills me so completely... probing my deepest depths... I'm... concerned that I may have already achieved a second orgasm... Ah! But... perhaps even more concerning is my inability to discern one way or the other!"

"You're sure you felt it break? Didn't it hurt at all?"

"It certainly stung for a moment, yes... Oh, but such sensation promptly melted away under your intense incandescence! Ah, Gods, Robin, you're a flame spreading throughout my entire anatomy... This heat... is it magic?! You must tell me!"

"I'm not doing anything!"

That much was true. My wife was doing all the writhing and wriggling as I merely looked on in concern. As soon as this occurred to me, I thought maybe I should do something about that, so I cupped my hands around her hips and began bouncing up and down on the floor, plunging myself into the hilt. The feel of her slippery lips and velvety pubic hair caressing the base of my shaft was absolutely heavenly; and if the furious wriggling of her hips and the noises pouring out of her mouth were any indication, Miriel was doing pretty well for herself, as well. She rest her chin on my shoulder and slipped her arms under my own, laying her hands on my back.

So this was sex.

I must admit, I see what the fuss is all about.

We built up a good rhythm, producing soft slaps as our thighs came in contact. I admit, under such pleasure, I zoned out for a bit; I don't know if it had been a few minutes or a few hours before she spoke my name, but as soon as she did, I could feel my focus return in an instant

"Robin," she said, not slowing down in the slightest.

"Yes?"

"Tharja is watching us."

My eyes went wide. Miriel didn't seem to have any intention of breaking her stride, so I decided not to, either. I kept my pace, perhaps even sped up a bit out of spite. I took a quick glance around the room, peering over my shoulders, but I could see no sign of anyone but us. "How can you tell?"

"I grew quite familiar with her habits as we observed you," said Miriel, still bouncing onto my cock. "She wears a very particular scent, manufactured from rare Plegian flora... Ahh! It is this enchanting bouquet... that stings my nostrils at this very moment."

I heard a faint rustling noise from somewhere - I hoped it was Tharja making her exit, but I knew it was far more likely to be the sound of her trying to conceal herself better.

"Should we go somewhere else?" I asked.

"I am not uncomfortable with an audience," she said. "Mmm... I merely wished to inquire if you were."

"...Kind of."

Miriel let out a sharp laugh. "The caliber of your erection and the vigor with which you persevere suggest otherwise," she said, her voice shaking as I continued pounding her. "Besides which... do you have it in your heart to deny such an intrepid, inquisitive mind access to insight as wonderful as this?"

I let out a deep sigh. "Well, when you put it that way, it sounds kind of cruel, but... I don't think Tharja is watching us with purely academic interests in mind..."

"No," said Miriel, "I can attest that she is most certainly not. Still... Oh! Just there... Mmm...! Still... her dedication must be commended... To risk being caught taking part in such blatant voyeurism... I think such efforts should be rewarded."

"What are you saying?"

She pulled her head from my shoulder and looked me square in the eyes. wearing a wry smile and blushing furiously. "I think we should give her a show," she said.

She pressed her forehead against mine and we gazed into each other's twinkling eyes for what seemed like ages. Finally, I could bear the tension not a moment longer. I no longer cared who was watching. I sunk my fingernails deep into her fleshy hips and shoved my tongue so far down her throat that it's a wonder she didn't choke. She curled her hands into fists, drawing deep scratches in my shoulder blades, and returned my kiss with such fire that it's a wonder we didn't _both_ choke. I bounced upon the stone floor, filling her as completely as I could. We pressed our bodies so tightly together that her breasts flattened against my chest, and as she moved her hands up my back, my mouth began to fill with her loud moans. The wet, breathy slurps and smacks and moans that poured out of us would have sickened me if I'd heard them coming from another couple, but in the heat of the moment they only made my erection throb with delight.

I would have been perfectly content to stay frozen like this until the end of time; my penis buried between her soft folds, my tongue being so lovingly smothered by her own, feeling her freckled breasts caress my chest and her ankles locked around my back. I have no memory of my experiences before Chrom found me in that field, but I can say with certainty that I couldn't possibly have experienced anything as tender and beautiful and incredible as my wife's embrace in that moment. No amount of magic or trauma could wipe such a powerful memory from my mind.

She broke from our kiss and a single strand of saliva bridged our mouths. It didn't break even as she threw her head back and screamed. "Yes! Robin, yes! That's it...! Ahh!"

I took that as instruction to redouble my efforts, and so I did, bouncing on the cold floor of the barracks even faster than I had been, filling the stone room with echoing _slaps_ of skin as Miriel's thick thighs came into contact with my own. I couldn't help but marvel at the narrow bridge of saliva that still stood between our chins, and I found myself hugging her tighter to me to keep her face from moving too far away from my own, wanting to see how long it could hold.

I could feel her thighs quivering and her ankles straightening so that her toes touched my back. "Ohhh! Heavens," she said, her voice cracking and trembling as she felt what must have been an especially powerful orgasm building inside of her. "This is... fascinating... I've lost control of my extremities...!"

I could feel something building, too, a tingling sensation in the back of my shaft. I slid my fingers down the crack of her rear, spreading her cheeks apart and pulling her up closer to me. She arched her spine backwards and tried to straighten her knees, letting her heels slide along the floor as she spread her thighs as far apart as she possibly could, so far apart that each of her calves touched the ground. She threw her head back as far as it would go, finally splitting the strand of saliva that had connected us for so long, and held onto my back tightly, as if she was scared of falling. Her hips and thighs shook with such force that for a moment I worried she was having a seizure. I was about to ask if she was all right when she began shouting at the top of her lungs, her words running together into one shrill declaration that surely was heard throughout the entire camp. I'll never forget what she said...

"Oh! What elation... What euphoria! The accounts I've read of two hearts beating in perfect synchronicity... I never fathomed them scientifically possible... but now! Ah, now, I apperceive their accuracy! Ahh! Robin, my flame! We conform like lock and key... I encounter your pulse with every taction of your supple fingers, every palpitation of your tempered manhood... Every heave of your taut musculature sends your heartbeat coursing through my body... A perfect reflection of my own! It's astounding... as if... we've become one! Ohh, my sodden aperture overflows with delectation yet again! My release has found me...! Don't stop, my love! Never, ever, s...top!"

I wanted to obey her command. With every fiber of my being, I wanted to obey. I wanted that beautiful moment to last a lifetime. But her sesquipedalian soliloquy was simply too much for me, and just as she paused during her final syllable, I closed my eyes and felt my member erupt with my hot seed, pouring into her and spilling out of her in the same instant. Her scabbard clamped tightly around my dick, wringing out even more spunk, lengthening both of our orgasms. I spoke my love's name through clenched teeth as sweat ran down my face and my breath left me.

"Nggh... Miriel," I said, "I... love you...!"

My words were met with a blissful squeal that rang out a full octave higher than any note I'd ever heard Miriel's husky voice reach. She quickly dipped back into her normal range, though, and spoke in a trembling whisper. "Robin... I... I've spent so much of my life struggling to reconcile this thing called 'love'..."

She collapsed onto me, bringing us both the ground. She rest her forehead on my own and hugged me with all her might. "Trying to break it down into autonomic physical responses," she said, "...into quantifiable, observable means that I might be able to apprehend..."

I saw tears falling from her eyes and pooling in the lenses of the glasses hanging from her ears. I reached up to her face and wiped a tear from her cheek with a smile.

"I never could have anticipated... that I would one day meet a partner capable of wrenching such potent, stalwart emotion from me... I love you, Robin. And what I'm about to disclose has no bearing in science or rationality... But I know it to be true all the same... You are... indisputably... irrevocably... my other half."

I hugged her back, cupping my hand around her neck and compressing her soft, freckled breasts against my chest. "And you are mine," I said, pulling her tightly against me. "On the day I awoke... it may have been Chrom who gave me a new life in that field... But, Miriel... you're the one who gave that life meaning. You make my life worth living."

She choked back further tears and bit her lip, beaming ear-to-ear. A single giggle escaped her and she pressed her lips against mine. She lay atop me, kissing me silently, my flaccid penis still sandwiched between her folds, for a good fifteen minutes. Add that to the rapidly growing list of moments that I wished could last forever.

When she finally rolled over and off of me, my dick slithered out of her with a soft _pop_. She lay next to me and laced her fingers between mine. I ran my thumb along her palm, feeling her silky skin, making a map of the creases in her hand. We stared at the ceiling in silence, completely nude, for another three or four minutes.

Finally, I spoke up.

"Well," I said, clearing my throat. "I think I would have to say... that we are definitely sexually compatible."

"That remains to be seen," said Miriel. She released a deep breath through her nose and adjusted her glasses. I felt my heart sink into the pit of my stomach. Why did she say all that stuff if she wasn't enjoying herself? I turned my head slightly to look her in the eyes, and she met my gaze with an uncharacteristically warm smile, which eased my discomfort a bit. "Empirical results cannot be discerned from but one such experiment," she said. "We must conduct hundreds - Nay! _Thousands_ of similar experiments... To arrive at a sound conclusion, we must account for every conceivable variable... We must engage in intercourse in differing locations, positions, times of day, differing states of undress..." Her face was beet-red, and her breath was growing heavier by the second. "We must see if you are able to perform under great stress, or in the public eye..."

I nearly felt my eyes leap out of my head. I tried to speak, but choked on my words, spitting out a few incoherent syllables before I was finally able to sputter out a retort. "In public?!"

"Of course," she said, turning to face me and assaulting my face with warm breath. "We know you have no anxiety performing sexual acts in front of Tharja, but suppose the entire camp was in attendance? I would also be fascinated to know if you are capable of giving such an exemplary performance under the scrutiny of total strangers... Gods, merely imagining such rigorous studies is causing involuntary shivers throughout my legs... My loins are already self-lubricating again..." She splayed her fingers across her face, totally failing to hide the blood filling her cheeks. "We should also evaluate how quickly you are able to regain an erection after reaching orgasm, how many consecutive orgasms you are capable of wringing out of me... How quickly we can deliver each other release, and how long either of us can fight it off... How many sexual encounters it will take for you to successfully impregnate me, the effects and viability of sexual intercourse during pregnancy...! Ohh!" Her voice cracked and she threw back her head, running her fingers down her neck and letting out a moan so sensual that it single-handedly pulled my erection back to half-mast. To my surprise, she rolled back onto me, straddling me, letting her erect nipples brush against my bare chest. I looked past her glasses into her quivering eyes, and I could swear her face was redder than her hair. "Come, Robin!" she said, "Ravish me! There's so much yet to be learned!"


End file.
